Hello,
We'd be happy to help walk you through the process of installing the 82-036, but we'd need more information on where you're running into a problem. I have personally used the 82-036 handle set to replace handles like yours. Thank you!
I'm afraid I can't talk to you over the phone, but I'm happy to help you here. If you can just describe to me exactly why the 82-036 won't work I can try to figure out what the problem is.
It really should have worked. These handles have a very basic design and are made to simply screw to the door. There's not much to them beyond that. I'm sure there's an easy fix for the issue you're having, I just need to know what the issue is before I can make a suggestion.
Okay, so the keeper is a different style and the screw through ways in the 82-036 are too large for the holes. These are definitely fixable problems.
For the screw through ways, the solution to this would be to take a rat tail file and make the holes in your door larger. You should only have to make them larger by a hair. It's a trial and error sort of thing; you'll have to file at it a bit, test the handle out, and if it's still not enough you just repeat the process.
As for the keeper, yours is a different style but ours sort of works the same way. It obviously can't use the same holes, but that's a simple matter of drilling new ones so that it up with the hooks on the 82-036. Try that out and see if it can fit in the frame.
I'm sorry that email is not convenient for you, but it's pretty much the only way we can do this. We get hundreds and hundreds of questions a day, and more than half of those people also have their houses closing. In fact I just talked to someone whose house is closing tomorrow, so you can understand what kind of a rush he was in. But I can't prioritize his time over another customer whose house is also closing tomorrow because that wouldn't be fair. Everyone who contacts us is in a rush and their time is equally important, so the only logical solution is to take their questions on a first come, first serve basis. Multiply this by 300 every single day and you can get an idea of what my work load is like.
We're also still a relatively small, family-owned business. It's simply not possible for us to give high level advice to all the people who need it over the phone as quickly as they want it. There's only one of me to to go around, after all! In the time it takes for me to have one phone conversation, I could help about 20 people who emailed in like this. If I could clone myself a dozen times and have all those Toms working around the clock, we would do it in a heartbeat. Unfortunately that's not possible, and it would probably overwhelm my girlfriend anyway.
I know it's not ideal for some people, but I hope you understand that it's a matter of practicality. We want desperately to help our customers but there are a ton of them and we can't prioritize any of them more than anyone else. This means we have to ask that you meet us half way.
Either way, hopefully my advice regarding your handle turns out to be helpful. I'm pretty sure that will fix your problems but if they don't, or if you have any follow-up questions, then you know where to find me.